Don’t Lie To Yourself. Do Not Lie To Me. Be Brave.

There are times when you know that something is wrong.
That you have that intuition, some certainties, a constant feeling in the pit of your stomach.
But you prefer not to face it.

You prefer to pretend nothing is wrong.
As if the relationship was okay.
As if that wasn’t hurting you.
As if it doesn’t bother you.

There are times when you think that if you don’t think about something it won’t happen.
That if you act like it doesn’t exist, it disappears.
But it doesn’t.
Everything is still there even if you don’t want to look at it.

There are times when you would like to delegate everything to others.
Make yourself a ball in bed and not have to take responsibility for the fact itself.
Stop time with a magic wand.
Always stay in the now.

Now that I am not making that decision.
Now that I don’t have to take over.
Now and not to come later.
But the after always comes.

And if it doesn’t, it’s because it’s all over.
You can try to lie to the rest, yeah
In fact: you can do it.

You can even become a professional lie.
In someone who is capable of believing that what counts is real.
But deep down, you know it’s not.

That not everything is so happy.
That not everything is going so well.
How clear that you are concerned, how clear that you are afraid.
Of course, that relationship ended centuries ago even though it still looks like the truth.

There are times you wish they did it for you.
Let them leave you.
You can even go out of your way to get them to.

Because in this way you continue without assuming what corresponds to you.
You still do not assume that you are part of something.
And that being part of something means being brave to look at that something head-on.
It means having to be honest even if it hurts.

There are times when you would like to close your eyes and that what you feel or that you no longer feel is not there.
But you wake up day by day and it’s still there.
And you can escape.
In fact everything is designed for you to escape.

Or you can just accept what happens.
With courage and with determination.
You can tell this is what it is.
And what do I want to do with what is there?

Because there are always two ways.
You can hide or you can make yourself visible.
You can be a coward or it can be you.
You.
You decide.